- the next trimester - the next trimester
Week 13 Week 14 : Kicked the habit! Week 15

"How cool would it be if I went into labour during Panto and the Hoff had to deliver my baby?" -a.

Baby stats:
Current uterus size: Large grapefruit
Amount of amniotic fluid: 300ml
Composed of: Baby urine and liquiform pixie dust
Rate of regeneration: Every 3 hours
Where does it come from, where does it go? It's a medical mystery exactly what amniotic fluid is made of as well as exactly how it regnerates.*

*In the future, please direct all "Where does it come from, where does it go" inquiries to the expert on such matters, Cotton-Eyed Joe.
Kevin's thoughts:
In all the years of, we've done profiles on our friends, on strangers, on acquaintances, on celebrities (Miss Arkansas IS a celebrity, thank you very much), our nephews, and even our parents. However, I don't think I've ever done a complete writeup directed towards my big brother.

"And why does Chris deserve a writeup?" those of you with older brothers would ask. "Surely, being an older brother, he's contributed nothing to your life but pain in the form of purple-nurples, an inferiority complex, or at the very least, a lifelong challenge of re-establishing the reputation of the family name?"

Certainly not. Sure, like all big brothers, he has his foibles, but nothing to the extent of anything that might happen to that kid on Malcolm in the Middle. Actually, on the whole he's a pretty decent guy.

I guess that's why somebody's finally decided to MARRY HIM.

YES, THAT'S CORRECT! Aimee and I aren't the only ones bringing a new Beimers into the family fold this year. Chris has been doing some recruiting of his own. After all, we can't have our little baby grow up with three uncles but only two aunts, can we? That wouldn't be fair.

Oh, what a lucky girl she is!
Luckily for the baby, Chris will be tying the knot a full two months before the baby is born, giving his new wife Eunice (pronounced "EH-yoo-NI-say", which is a whole lot prettier than "YEW-niss" if I may say so) plenty of time to adjust to the lofty ideals and responsibilities of what it takes to hold the title of "Mrs Beimers", and even loftier ideals and responsibilities of becoming "Auntie Eunice".

(Actually, the title of "Auntie" will probably only require the occasional birthday card, whereas the title of "Mrs", knowing my brother, will most likely involve plenty of cooking things using appliances other than the microwave, bathroom mildew removal, and listening to your husband talk at great lengths about topics in which you have but a passing interest. Heeheeha! I'm allowed to say mean things about him because a) he's my brother, and b) he doesn't have a retaliatory website.)

So, those of you out there who were worried that Chris was never going to get married, FEAR NOT! It's true! Just imagine that little pocket of worry in your brain frittering away, leaving an empty hole where a worry used to be.

...And you can use that freed up space for a brand new worry: HOW THE HELL IS AIMEE GOING TO FLY TO CANADA 7 MONTHS PREGNANT?
Aimee's thoughts:
If there was a thankful equivalent to Holy Frickin Frack, I would say it now. THANK GOODNESS. To the great relief of myself, Kevin, Kevin's mom, Cindy, my brother and sister, my co-workers, my boss, the guy who lives downstairs, the people who travel on the tube with me, and the Green Park maintenance men, my morning/afternoon/evening sickness has now stopped.

And not a moment too soon, let me tell you. I was this close to booking myself in for alternative therapies... Accupressure, accupuncture - anything beginning with "accu" and I would have signed up if there was the slightest chance it would help. Luckily, the gods have saved me from having to dip my toe into anything too unknown.

A small tribute to all the things that induced vomitting during those horrible few months, that I can now tolerate again (though some are still slightly unpleasant):

  • The washing machine
  • Opening the fridge
  • Sitting on the stairs
  • Watching the corner store
         unload meat
  • Onions
  • Brushing my teeth
  • Pasta sauce
  • Looking at the orange bowl
  • Bad breath
  • Really ugly people (honest!)

    The first few days after feeling better were very cautious. I thought that if I crept around very slowly my stomach wouldn't realize that it hadn't thrown up in days. Every time one of us looked at the other and began to say "Do you think it's sto..." the other person shusshed them into silence. This must have worked because I officially haven't thrown up in five whole days.

    The entire morning sickness experience was truly humiliating and humbling. Unless you've been through it to the degree that I was, I don't think you can appreciate what a complete mess it can make of you and how worrying it can be for those around you. I am just so glad to be starting to feel like myself again, albeit a slower, tired version of myself.

    So what's next now that I've gotten through the most difficult two months of my life (yes, the Kimberley in December was easier than this!)? Perhaps it's time for me to put my feet up, relax, and enjoy being pregnant for the next 6 months!

    Enh. In retrospect, this is kind of a crappy writeup. Sorry. My next one will be better. I'm obviously still getting back into the swing of things.

    Did you know?

    Our baby can now be convicted of crimes! The crime of being too cute, that is!

    Now that all the hard work is done, like the growing of eyes and development of kidney and all that, the fine tuning begins. This is the week that the baby begins to develop its own set of unique fingerprints!

    Now, when Horatio* gets to the scene of the crime and finds teeny, tiny fingerprints, he can say something profound like, "Hm. I'd say this crime - [puts on sunglasses] - was a little premature."

    *Horatio is from CSI:Miami, not, repeat NOT, a name we've been considering for our child.
    Preggy Pal of the Week!

    Michelle and Dave
    When was your baby born? I gave birth at 39 weeks.... a little girl on April 22nd at 11:28am.

    What did you name her? We named her Keira Elizabeth Ward. If it was a boy it would have been Avery.

    Did you know the sex of the baby before it was born? Nope, not until the birth day!

    Any weird cravings? I didn't have any.... I just wanted everything that was bad for me (like greasy hamburgers and french fries).

    The best pregnancy advice you'd like to pass on? Since Keira is 6 weeks old now I would like to pass on this advice to new moms: Take the help if offered... especially if someone brings you a home cooked meal (This was the best present ever!!)

    Anything else you'd like to add? Pregnancy is AWESOME!
    Aimee's cravings

    Walnuts and even more cherries. Our little baby is probably going to come out of the womb shiny red with a pit for a heart if I keep this up. What a disgusting thought. Oh well, too late to change it now, it's already uploaded.

    Everyone into the poll!

    In a few more weeks, we head back to the ultrasound machine (we LOVE that thing!) for the second-most exciting day of the pregnancy: The Day We Discover The Sex Of The Baby Day!

    But, interestingly enough, the two Preggy Pals of the week on the site so far have both kept it a surprise until the delivery room. Strange, we thought... or perhaps we're the strange ones? Let's find out...
    Q. Would you find out the sex of your baby?
         Yup!         Nope!
    Tell us why in a very small box:

    Results next week!
    Last Week's Poll: Showing off your bare bump in public...

    Baby's Book of the Week

    A Lovely Day for Amelia Goose
    By Yu Rong
    A very simple and delightful book that follows Amelia Goose as she spends the day playing with her friend, Frog. We've read this one about five times now and it never loses its charm! Flip! Flop! Flip! Flop!

    Send a message to the womb and beyond!

    life is just
    a bowl
    of puke

    We've got mail...

    Just a quick note to let you know that I'm anxiously following your development(s). baby.beimers is fantastic, informative and hilarious. You guys rule.
    I'm also excited about your projected due date of November 26th - that's my birthday! It's also the birthday of my sister-in-law (weird, huh?) who is *also* expecting (due sometime in February). As such, my brother (Scottie) and his wife (Amy) are now also devoted readers.
    Thanks for making the world a happier place. Congrats on your impending family-hood.
    - Jeff
    San Francisco, CA

    Oh, wow, congrats, it's about time, this is splendid news (except for the puking bit which is just gross), oh but you're glowing, etc, etc.
    And tell me now - your avatars are both looking older - does this represent a maturation of your drawing style Kevin, or is it a deliberate ploy to allow the new child character to fill the 'cute' role whilst yourself and Aimee evolve into the the role filled, for example, by the Alice and Henry Mitchell figures in the Dennis the Menace strip? Not that youse aren't cute anymore or anything - I'm sure you'll make the cover of Cute Families magazine. I'll have to check the site again in about six months to see how you depict baby poo in illustration. Hmm, something to look forward to.
    Anyway, this is v.good news, congrats again and best wishes.
    - Sydney
    Adelaide, SA

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